carrot rope

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ierW59K2qKw

i don't know where this came from, i-ii-iii-iv. easy.

psychiatry swims in disparate culture bound theories that conflict and conflate in individuals. the pomp and practice fight to settle on some agreed ground while individuals spin and bicker around the edges. there is a slow rolling ball that spins in the dark, steady and whole, taking its time. no apology, not even under your quick fire. then things begin

there is thought in you,

taking elephantine form,
elliptical,
and love,
stop reassuring
move forward
with your bubbling fury
and crimson panic
the day is beginning

look at me

and here i am

La Lune

 w and connections

i went to a conference late today and got second hand
the talk on Gin
and new street drugs
on reenactment on a beach
deferred Eisenstein

new plans can be slow
10 years
application
synthesis
listening
with what bubbles

Morning in Kopenhagen

Tisdag

1) 

This is where i might be when i am inside my studio.

Except there are no windows at all.

Before all my work was made with light from outside.

2)

This evening I spoke to Lilly on the phone which i have not done for a long time. I don't ring friends.

It was really good to speak with her.

3)
This afternoon I went to a reading group about Wittgenstein (Roy Brook's book)
I'm writing this about a group, who talked about a book, which is about Wittgenstein.
People said that in his later work he wrote about how imperfect words are, that it is impossible for them to express what they intend to say.
That things can't be said, only shown.
That he criticises how science claims to hold real value and that science as a discipline insinuates that arts are just for pleasure.
Some one said that he thought Eisenstein demonstrated a deterioration in culture from Chopin.
That his artist parents told him not to do art because he wasn't good enough so he became an engineer, and then found Russell in Cambridge.
That he wrote the work he most esteemed in the trenches
The he had to write and reject his first work before he could make his second
That he discussed the impossibility of describing internal worlds
I think he stayed in Norway on his own for a long time.
He liked poetry
He never studied past philosophers, and advised people not to.
He eventually decided that many things // experiences // cannot be said.
He taught that you have to get out of the arm chair and live them.

4)

This morning I went to a workshop about writing a paper 

(and another less memorable on about applying for  money about margins and overheads)

The workshop about papers said that writing one is like an upside down triangle

You start at the top and distill down

That you start with your data, your methods and your results , and you write around it
You work out what the grand narrative is out there
And you write your story
And you show it to other people and hear their criticism

That it all takes a long time

And that all the time you are involved  somewhere in the cycle of it continuously

Even when it is finished, sent and accepted.

e

I went to the pub today and had half a pint of ale
We thought about starting a zine about loosing and having hair
Called cheap hand job, Lamp, Beard or Barnet.
I was too hot in a thick wool jumper, which i have worn everyday for the past ten days.
It is cold outside but the lamps are warm.
I got up early and travelled to talk about the way things fall out
And then played with data
And talked with super bright people.

I like my new job today.

Palladium

david attenborough's wife
ghost tour
failure
possessions on the floor
lights
lying on the floor
you do it because we don't have time

old

rain
soft
hair
thin
grey
light

chill october

pavement is wet lit immediate
air warm thick fog hug heavy the corner
dissolve the fast moving cars
white
mist brown green orange
fog
pear
7

L E M O N

My favourite jumper (thank you Dorthe!)

Reading list October

Line of Beauty

Cinema 1

SHE

You are what i like to look at

Dry eyed and restless

Remembering the words

I defered telling you, i didin't want to be told

There is a picture of you lent against the wall, looking up. You are relaxed in a shirt and yellow cardigan. Your trousers are too big. Your feet are on edge.

I remember how i took seriously your  words. So my experience was sharper than you remember. As you experimented.

We spun and spin, but i dare not let on how it feels. Tear from a dry eye disappears.

Your spirit and mine overlap in places that make you alive too.

lets go out side

small sad angry fish

This is stunning

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=QAkD5zL5Epc

Martin

Thinking comes to those who think

(The problem is that we are still not yet thinking)

Whitechapel ESTATES FUGITIVE IMAGES Andrea Luka Zimmerman

be / picture

http://plusscreening.org/

lesson 1

unexplained has to be ok

Night tree

This summer has been a mix up. The clear thread that runs through is a space appearing in which to work instead of squashing ideas into the routine of everything else, with which they sit uncomfortably.
Starting to carry this space around all the time, even in the crash and chaos of employment. Seeping ideas in to eyes and skin and limbs and having space when it is there. Working with minds that see in straight lines much more clearly than my side ways moves, without flattening the edges. Listening to trains and walking with wonky hips. We sat in the garden in the dark and talked it over. "This can hold together".

dyslexia

organisation

time slips away so unpredictably

phonological awareness

rhythm

balance

body

anxiety

esteem

words

numbers

intelligence

disorganisation

chaos

stimulus

create

unpredictable

know

sense

Nettleton's

HOUSE MUSIC CAN BE BEAUTIFUL

(HOLDING AT THE SAME TIME)

settled places
in faces

time creeping

following

falling

singing

sinking

moulding

following

shaking

time taken
broken sparrow

time taking

time wasting

late
early
time measured in light
and looks
and corrections

following

falling

singing

moulding

following

shaking

stretching
breaking 

time taken

time taking

time wasting

time loving

time waiting
face on fire

tic toc

(PUSH BACK)

time out

CLUB INTEGRAL

UNCATEGORIZED

ACCIDENT & EMERGENCY – 6/9/12

Accident & Emergency
Club Integral @ The Others
6-8 Manor Road,
Stoke Newington,
London,
N16 5SA
Thursday September 6th
8.30 pm
£5/£3

Shimmy Rivers And And Canal
Shimmy Rivers And And Canal are a UK beat combo that was formed in Dalston, London in 2003.
In 2005 Resonance FM released a collection of demo recordings. The same year, the band played at Resonance FM’s 3rd Anniversary event at the Conway Hall, and in 2006–2007 hosted the station’s ‘Daddy Said So Land’ radio show, with live sessions, and interviews with Alexa Chung, Let’s Wrestle and Sonny Tufts.
Shimmy Rivers and and Canal disbanded in February 2009, playing a final gig at Barden’s Boudoir on February 27. The band released a 7″ record on the Siltbreeze record label in January 2009. Their debut album, Forks, recorded and mixed by Capitol K, was released in 2009.
Members of the band included Scout Niblett, and Koichi and Niiyan from Screaming Tea Party.
The band have recently reformed and are writing new material.
The most thoroughly “out there” rock band of the last decade, creators of “utterly timeless” music in the opinion of WFMU’s Dave Mandl.
“Shimmy Rivers were playing in the Utrophia project space long before I think they knew they were a band.
In fact, a manifestation of the Shim played at Utrophia’s first ever opening party at the Engine House many moons ago.
I remember that they then had a cd with millions of tunes on it consisting of loads of different people and kinds of sounds, all of which stitched together to create a blanket of people living in an area at a certain time.
It was incredibly inspiring.” Utrophia
“Shimmy changed and morphed shape loads of times but always had a raw trundling energy about them.Like an indignant wriggling frantic child, bending and trying to destroy the very song they were playing. Which is pretty darn exciting to watch.”
Barrel

Ivor Kallin – viola, Hannah Marshall – cello, Alison Blunt – violin
“Flurries of notes and clunky bridge nudge noise flutter around gracefully drunken descents, three dowager duchesses sliding down the banister in a rain of ripped confetti.” Stewart Lee, Sunday Times 2011
http://www.alisonblunt.com/BARREL.html
Inclementine Quartet:
An esoteric cross-continent project from Natalie Mason, Cara Stacey and friends fusing South African rural folk music with the western maverick classical tradition.
“…Moondog goes to Capetown…” Kent Snow, The Improbable Times, 2012
http://inclementine.bandcamp.com/
The Earl of Killorglin
His Grace’s one man show.
Well-bred bon-mots from the shebeens of south London
http://thecsiders.wordpress.com/memoirs-of-his-grace/
Rucksack Cinema
Left-field live cinematics from Jaime Rory Lucy

LOVE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vc5HnZP5v6s

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5RN4-WlzHME

open frame // play for today

sea birds that look for their cages
traps that keep their jaws wide
walk into unforgiving places
planting trees still breathing seething
the skys still milk and like your eye
the light falls on most of the leaves
and despite decisions poorly thought of
i shape the next word and the next time and
you look for open eyes in circles

delfina foundation

women's pond!

http://www.klpa.org.uk/

snotra

eccentric non sense loops at nowhere . com

the institution contacts you

to tell you how

you aren't relevant

unless you can

follow the instruction

endless answering machine messages 

automated texts

no reply return to sender emails

the institution tells you

there is no grass, no trees, no sky, ground, no gravity, no sound

only command text

a bad night

locks on the doors
protect the vulnerable
male sway over
stances overbearing
eyes glaring
this is the night
in electric lights
standing over us
the system is driving
down narrow corridors

the vulnerable are powerful
time programmed
you work
call and demand
shift workers frustration
soaking up anger
becoming another
subjects are crawling
biting stealing
punching strangling
actions are futile
catharsis
closing and opening
shitting words
protecting the vulnerable
the logistics of the institution
safety is spatial
and reversal demands
locks on the doors

the escape root is not so high

blue

blue flame
how long

curved glass
in miserable places
leaving by the window

carried by a bowl
steadied by our hands
held by curved surface

HOME

the low side traces steadily/ face

it takes along ride

to get out of

your slow emerging battle ground

eggs and blueberries

tight shorts and corsets

blue sky and tree shaken light

leave your tired omnipotence

for hidden oppulence

reep

you were the first one to see
lover of brutal surfaces
open eyes yield

And I love light. Perhaps you'll think it strange that an invisible man should need light, desire light, love light. But maybe it is exactly because i am invisible. Light confirms my reality, gives birth to my form.... Without light i am not only invisible, but formless as well; and to be unaware of one's form is to live a death. I myself, after existing some 20 years, did not become alive until i discovered my invisibility....

l was made from the knife they nearly killed you with
l was a bow and arrow made from stone.

standing motionless at a busy junction
with a smile and a misunderstanding,

a quickening step
a violent beat
a stranger's work.

l was made from stone
public and inert.

a paralysed stone cupid
stared at us

red

frustration
restless bee
the air is filled with
pollen dust.
your fleeting satisfaction
at sweet thick dark haired dreams.
the bleached day
turns to pale half light.
all colours are drained to faded oatmeal,
clothes discoloured grey,
so you close your eyes.
you close your eyes and see red.
obvious, the night pours in around you
and you stand eyes closed
all is red

sunday

anais nin
gananath obeyesekere
sigmund freud
otto rank
theravada

routine

as if time were always just like this or that

i miss your
uncaring
wild days
strings and soft knees
your love of things
the pace of your days
and the way of your untethered thoughts
ingenious found airbound
settle anchored in ink

L'incertitude

«Château et clinique de La Borde, fête du 15 août.
Comme dans le poème, c'est l'incertitude qui domine, chez Rimbaud incertitude entre le sommeil et la mort. Là, troublant tout autant, incertitude entre la santé et cette autre chose qu'on nomme la folie à défaut de mots plus justes. En ce jour de fête où patients et visiteurs se retrouvent, on ne sait qui est qui, et d'ailleurs c'est une des règles de cet endroit, loin des étiquettes communes.
Cet homme qui dort, donc, je ne saurais jamais s'il s'agit d'un pensionnaire de la clinique ou d'un visiteur fatigué. Et cette rue de Rivoli improbable qui s'inscrit au dessus de son corps immobile est le reflet d'un monde où tout serait possible...»

bugs and fury

at home
afloat pirate
shifting rain
sliding grease
shaping bowls
two figures
rocking heavy
balancing bluster
at inky sea

names

sad unhappy bitter blue cheerless dejected despairing despondent disconsolate dismal distressed doleful down downcast forlorn gloomy glum grieved hurting languishing low low-spirited, lugubrious melancholy morbid morose mournful pensive pessimistic somber sorrowful sorry troubled weeping wistful

COGNITIVE DISSONANCE cognitive dissonance

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1kmVy1QPXn0

From When Prophecy Fails

The next step in preparation was the removal of metal. The Creator and Sananda went over the matter thoroughly and left no doubt in anyone's mind that to leave any metal on one's person or in one's clothes would be a very dangerous error. All the believers complied painstakingly with this order. Arthur Bergen, for example, carefully unwrapped the tinfoil from each stick of chewing gum in his pocket. Coins and keys were removed from pockets and watches from wrists. Many of the group had already checked their clothes and shoes carefully but now they went over them again and consulted each other about possible omissions. It was agreed that those who wore glasses with metal frames could simply discard them immediately before entering the saucer. For some reason, never specified, identification of any kind was also to be removed from one's person - it could be destroyed on the spot or simply left behind, but not taken to the saucer. Since this was a new order and an unanticipated one, it produced a flurry of excitement as the members sought to recall what items of identification they might be carrying. Finally, the "secret books" of Marian's messages were ordered packed into a large shopping bag and given to Mark Post to carry aboard the saucer. These preparations consumed a great deal of time, for each one was carefully reviewed and cross-checked. There was no margin for error.
At about 11:15, Mrs. Keech received a message ordering the group to get their overcoats and stand by. There were a few minutes of milling about and the group reassembled in the living room, where Marian instructed everyone to be seated quietly and to "act as if this were just an ordinary gathering of friends" in an ordinary house. She particularly warned the members not to stand in front of the living room window, lest they attract the notice of the police, newspapermen, or neighbors who might be watching and might attempt to follow the group when it left. She was especially concerned about the police and made a careful check to see whether a patrol car was outside the house. Her suspicions of being watched were reinforced when twice the phone rang but there was no answering voice on the other end of the line. These calls, Marian asserted, were from reporters checking to see whether the group was still at the house.
By 11:30 all was in readiness and there was nothing to do but wait and think of things that had been overlooked. The few details that did come up were disposed of hurriedly, for everything had to be in order by midnight. When Arthur Bergen suddenly remembered that his shoes had metal toecaps, it was too late to cut them out. From the ensuing excitement emerged the suggestion that he should simply loosen the laces and step out of his shoes before entering the saucer. At about 11:35, one of the authors let it be known that he had not removed the zipper from his trousers. This knowledge produced a near panic reaction. He was rushed into the bedroom where Dr. Armstrong, his hands trembling and his eyes darting to the clock every few seconds, slashed out the zipper with a razor blade and wrenched its clasps free with wire-cutters. By the time the operation was complete it was 11:50, too late to do more than sew up the rent with a few rough stitches. Midnight was almost at hand and everyone must be ready on the dot.
The last ten minutes were tense ones for the group in the living room. They had nothing to do but sit and wait, their coats in their laps. In the tense silence two clocks ticked loudly, one about ten minutes faster than the other. When the faster of the two pointed to 12:05, one of the observers remarked aloud on the fact. A chorus of people replied that midnight had not yet come. Bob Eastman affirmed that the slower clock was correct; he had set it himself only that afternoon. It showed only four minutes before midnight.
These four minutes passed in complete silence except for a single utterance. When the (slower) clock on the mantel showed only one minute remaining before the guide to the saucer was due, Marian exclaimed in a strained, high-pitched voice: "And not a plan has gone astray!" The clock chimed twelve, each stroke painfully clear in the expectant hush. The believers sat motionless.

Lazarus and the Sea

I could say nothing of where I had been,
But I knew the soil in my limbs and the rain-water
In my mouth, knew the ground as a slow sea
unstable
Like clouds and tolerating no organisation
such as mine

Peter Redgrove

cloudy shine

noisy
heart
works
space

glass noise

dogon dream

Foetus, dogon mask, mobile phone, grace jones

Before the world was created, there was a God called Amma who had the appearance of an egg. Amma created four male and four female creatures. The males are: Nommo Die, Nommo Titiyayne, O Nommo and Ogo and were created in the form of fish. But Ogo rebelled before he was fully finished, as he wanted to make the creation his own. O Nommo was sacrificed to pay back the error of his twin Ogo and came down to earth in the ark that carried men’s ancestors and all living beings. Ogo, rebelling against Amma, detached himself from Amma’s placenta, ripping part of it away, and came down to earth with the ark.

In leaving Amma’s womb prematurely, he did not wait for the full gestation of his twin. He found himself weak and alone because Amma had transformed the piece of placenta torn out by Ogo, into our earth and the moon. Ogo, displeased with the earth, unfit for cultivation, went back up to the sky to interrupt Amma’s work and to retrieve the remains of his placenta. But Amma, wanting to put this piece of placenta out of Ogo’s reach, transformed it into our sun. Next, Amma transformed Ogo into a four legged creature, a pale fox that from that moment on would be the instrument of chaos in the universe. In accepting the opposition of the fox, and the chaos that he brought to the universe, Amma allowed psychological dualism and individualization to be created. In order to reorganize the universe that had been disturbed by the fox, Amma decided to sacrifice her twin brother O Nommo. His blood served to purify the earth and his body, cut into pieces, allowed the stars, the animals and the plants to appear. After this purification of the universe, O Nommo was brought back to life and sent back to earth by Amma, to give birth to humans and to reorganize life on earth. Amma had made men immortal, but following the chaos brought by the fox to the earth, death appeared. The ark in which Ogo had come down to earth became uncultivated land, and that of O Nommo the symbol for cultivated land. After all the beings had descended from the ark, O Nommo (or Nommo) returned to  his fish like form and went to live in the great expanse of water (the oceans) that had been born of the first rainfall. It is in the water that Nommo reveals to man the words woven through his teeth.

The Dogan religion is made up of the belief in Amma, distant and immaterial God, but which is realized through institutions and ongoing actions towards the ancestors:

1° The cult of the immortal totemic ancestors.

2° The Lebe cult, a great ancestor who died and was brought back to life in the form of a snake. Lebe is the great ancestor whose sons gave birth to the four tribes: Dyon, Dommo, Ono and Arou.

3° The mask cult, mortal ancestors.

daughter of a twin

"our unlived lives – the lives we live in fantasy, the wished-for lives – are often more important to us than our so-called lived lives."

generous thinking

You are invited to the preview of

(IN)VISIBILITIES
Andrea Francke and Annette Krauss

Tuesday 26 June, 6.30–8.30pm

Exhibition continues:
27 June–28 July 2012
Wednesday–Saturday, 12–6pm

The exhibition (in)visibilities brings together two projects commissioned within The Showroom’s ongoing programmeCommunal Knowledge: Annette Krauss’s Hidden Curriculum and Andrea Francke’s Invisible Spaces of Parenthood: A Collection of Pragmatic Propositions
for a Better Future.

EVENTS: Monday 2 July, 7–9pm
Spaces of Equality: (in)visibilities, an event with Annette Krauss, Andrea Francke and Dennis Atkinson, Professor of Art in Education at Goldsmiths, University London.

Communal Knowledge is generously supported by Paul Hamlyn Foundation, John Lyon’s Charity, Esmée Fairbairn Foundation, Arts Council England, Westminster Cultural Olympiad supported by Westminster City Council, BNP Paribas and Vital Regeneration, The Showroom Supporters Scheme, and Outset as The Showroom’s Production Partner 2012.

It is realised in the framework of COHAB, a two-year collaborative project with Casco, Office for Art, Design and Theory, Utrecht and Tensta Konsthall, Stockholm supported by a Cooperation Measures grant from the European Commission Culture Programme (2007–2013).

THE SHOWROOM

63 Penfold Street

London NW8 8PQ

T 020 7724 4300

theshowroom.org

TUO TI HSELF

Ben - Emily Wardill

noughties!

speeding up

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-18428042

melancholia

economic function
definition
exhibition

http://www.londonconsortium.com/courses/down.php

Amalia Pica Chisenhale

Courtship of the Peoples

                                 












http://simonoldfield.com/exhibitions/courtship-of-the-peoples/

MFA Exhibition Goldsmiths and Slade

Hubert Sauper, Darwin's Nightmare (2004)

(working nights) (ache)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WAsCEkq4I8s

Mardi

DON:T LIKE BEING TOLD WHAT TO DO

Jean Rhys Wide Sargasso Sea

the white hart

boiling words to see what becomes of them
as they appear in your mouth

EL

http://africasacountry.com/2012/06/01/friday-music-break/

Josef Albers, Hommage to the Square: Green Scent, 1963, Oil on fiberboard, 121 x 121 cm, Ludwig Donation 1976

josef albers

colours present themselves in continuous flux, constantly related to changing neighbours and changing conditions

schauen as in weltschauung

sitting